If there is a taboo in male sexology is inserting things in our rectum. Since getting your butt “invaded” is part of gay sex, anal insertion is controversial among heterosexual men. Some guys will simply say “That shit is gay! I’ll never do that!” and then you have straight guys like me who will say “Let’s try it with restrictions… What’s the worse thing that can happen?”

Well, this is yet another post about my never ending journey of enjoying my male sexuality. A few years ago, I purchased a few anal plugs / prostate massagers from the Pipedream Anal Fantasy line. They were on sale and I wanted a couple of basic and cheap massagers to take on trips. After all, I did not want to get a $80 toy lost in a hotel! The two I bought were the Perfect Plug – a small plug with a thumb-like head – , and the aptly named One Finger Fantasy plug, which literally looks like an index finger.

Those of you reading my posts in the last 15 years know I have a love and hate relationship with the Pipedream brand. I find them very hit or miss and often the products I enjoyed from them were overpriced. Were these two small butt plugs a hit? Were they another miss? Well, the only way to know is reviewing them, so let’s go to the review!

First Impressions

This plug is a small one with an insertable length of 3.5 inches (9 cm) and a width of 1.25 inches (3.5 cm). It looks like a swollen thumb, it is made of silicone and according to the company it “can be worn all day for long lasting fun”.

Their copy also points that is perfect for either G-spot or P-spot stimulation, has a curved tail for safe and easy removal (more about that later), it is contoured for comfort and thanks to the material, it is hygienic and body safe. The copy on the box also guides you through the process of inserting and caring for your new toy, making the experience less “traumatic” to new users. Since it is marketed to beginners, the box also includes sample “anal lube”, finger gloves (to “warm up” your butt hole before inserting the plug), plus their “toy cleaner”. A complete package for immediate enjoyment…

I am not a beginner with prostate massagers, but I can appreciate the effort in providing a quick easy experience. At least in theory.

Review

In practice, the Perfect Plug is not that perfect.

Inserting it is not an issue, but you really need to apply plenty of lube to the head and a bit of pressure because of its bulb shape. Once inserted, it feels comfortable giving the expected pleasure from this type of toy. But this is when things get interesting…

The Perfect Plug has a short, flexible tail to “ensure” it stays in place and avoid getting sucked in your black hole. Unfortunately, the short tail requires you insert the toy with the tail near the testicles because if you use the toy IN ANY OTHER ORIENTATION, your black hole WILL SUCK IT IN! Twice while using this toy I found myself panicking when I went to remove this little fucker and could not find the tail to grab. Fortunately for me, I did not have to go to the ER to remove it (I relaxed and basically shat it out).

Even when I inserted the toy in its “right” position, removing it was a bit difficult. You know, when you are a 300 pounds gorilla, you tend to have some issues reaching your behind. Personally, I have a combination of being a fat ugly bastard plus having issues in my shoulders (arthritis), so reaching my chocolate starfish can be challenging some days. With most safe anal toys, the base makes easier to grab the slippery toy – just hook a finger or two around the base or the usual hoop and you can pull out the plug without effort. That does not happen with the Perfect Plug.

The short tail on the Perfect Plug does not allow to really grasp the base of the toy for removal. It takes a bit of effort to grab the small tail with your fingertips, slippery with lube and fluids. With other toys, I simply use the plug in a different orientation to assist me reach around, but as said before, the Perfect Plug has a tendency to get sucked in if you use it in alternative orientations.

That is a shame, because being honest, it is a comfortable plug to wear and it gives intense sensations when you use it for long sessions. But the great sensations are not worthy of spending time in the ER to get a physician to remove the freaking cork out of your butt like you were a champagne bottle in a cheap wedding.

Verdict

It feels good, but the tiny floppy tail serving as base is basically useless. The toy can be even dangerous for people of large size like me, so if you are a fatty like myself, stay away from this toy…unless you are willing to visit the ER to get it removed.

Score: 18 / 25 (72%)

Comfort: 5/5

Insertion: 4/5 – Can be a bit awkward to insert due to the bulbous shape.

Sensations: 4/5

Removal: 2/5

Value: 3/5 – I bought it for less than $10, but I am scared every time I use it.